Ryan (Left) and JT Wiese (right)

The Interview
Ryan N. of the Fremont Five

JW: Good evening.
RN:Good evening ( in a cheesy xbritishx accent)
JW: How’s the band doing, you and Baker that is?
RN: Oh the fremont five?
JW: Yes, the fremont five. How are you guys?
RN: Up. well, we’re alright. except Baker left the band to start a solo thing called “Fremont”. Its a ben folds thing.
JW: How would you describe your “music” in three words?
RN: Piss fucking Poor
JW: Piss fucking Paul?
RN: No, Piss fucking POOR.
JW: Ah. Well, when can we except a fremont five live show?
RN: What the hell? Who do you think we are, fucking Ben & Tom? Prostituting themselves out to everyone? Fuck that all.
JW: Thats rather rude…
RN: Who the fuck are you to tell me what rude is? do you have some alsolute rule of moral good and evil? fuck you cow. (sandal off, urinating in the corner) Give me some privacy here.
JW: uh..
Rn: Ah, Better…
JW: What album in music history has influenced you the most?
RN: Beatles – Revolver
JW: Thats not that original.
RN: Isay its not even orignal to say something original these days….ah, go to hell.
JW: Alright, it has come to the part of the interview when i tell you one word and you say the first thing that comes to mind.
RN: Alright.
JW: Nugget
RN: Golden.
JW: Antique
RN: Penis.
JW: First Class
RN: Wound
JW: Pancakes
RN: Brown Star.
JW: Did you just say brown star?
RN: I mean syrup.
JW: King.
RN: Fat fucker.
JW: Larry Bird.
RN: Upper lip hair.
JW: Consolo
RN: What? Consolo.
JW: Pudding.
JW: Racist?
RN: Bill Cosby….puddin’ pops.
JW: It Ends Here
RN: Pure Zero.
JW: Tiffincore.
RN: Uncle Ferris.
JW: thanks for your time Ryan.
RN: Piss on you.

**After this interview, Ryan admitted that he said “brown star”.

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